Tuesday, May 20, 2008

two years old

Lord,
seeing our two-year-old
hurricane of a granddaughter
over this past weekend has given me
new respect
for my daughter, Sarah...and
her husband, Chad.

They deal with this little
amazing girl
who needs to have her way
SO desperately
that she gives a
TOTAL COMMITMENT to everything
she does.

She does nothing unless
it's all or nothing!

Yet even as I see her express
EXTREME dissatisfaction, I cannot help
but note that she is only two years old!
She doesn't know any better.
For
this is the stage of life where she has begun
to realize that the universe
does NOT revolve around her.

Naturally, this disturbs her...
but then, she is only two!

Too often,
like a two-year-old,
I
hold my breath
stiffen my body...and
cry loudly
whenever things don't
go my way...

Too often, Lord,
I stick out my lower lip
I want to quit...and
I demand that You fix
things...to be
the way I want them
to be.

My comfort zone seems to be
as small as that of our
grand-girl...
but then, she is only two!

Is it because I want
MY kingdom to come...
MY will to be done...
instead of wanting
the waiting
the looking for
the working for
Your will...and
Your kingdom to come,
Lord?

Am I too much like our little,
beautiful
grand-girl...who
is only two?
She doesn't know any better...while
I do...at least,
I should.

Lord,
You show me so much
grace, mercy...and
a long-suffering heart.
You restrain from judgment...
over & over
giving me the benefit of
the doubt.

Your love floods
me...pouring over my fear...
my doubt...
making them into bad memories...
as long as I look at You!

When I was a child...
I thought
as a child...
I spoke
as a child...but
when I became a man,
I put away childish things.

There is SO much hope
for our grand-girl...because
she turns three in awhile...and
she
has wonderful a mom & dad who
model Jesus to her
each day.

My hope, Lord,
is in YOU...
Your Love...
Your growing Presence...in me.

Like our grand-girl, I
want You to grow me up
so that I might more & more
reflect Your face.